I feel like shit today. I cried most of the time. I hate myself. I have a life that everyone would dream of and yet I'm not even happy living in it. It's so hard when you are not able to talk about your pain. Only to God. Been asking for God's help into showing me if this is the life that I really want. I don't just sit around and not do anything about it. I did try. A lot actually. I really put an effort into this life. Was it worth it? Yes. But do I want to be in it? I don't know. I really don't know. Separate life? Really...? I don't know.
Honestly, I don't know for how long I can do this. Please don't make me choose.
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